More Rules

Here are today's public transportation rules to live by:

- do not stand at the top (or bottom) of the escalator, surveying the wonder of the world around you.  Move.  You are creating a log jam, and we are stacking up behind you like cord wood.

- do not leisurely stroll through the middle of the subway platform.  (See above rule.). Do you drive in the middle lane just below the speed limit?  

- do not shove me.

- if the train is full, do not assure the masses that "of course, I can get on" while pushing forward.  We will chuckle, and then become irritated, as the door repeatedly gets stuck on your ass.  You're making us late for work.

- tall people, be aware of your elbow placement.  I don't want to take one to the face.

Thank you for your consideration, and thank you for riding the T.

Slow News Day

     Not a lot has been interesting on the train for the last couple of days.  I believe it has to be due to the weather.  It's so cold that everyone just looks tired and "done."  You know what I mean.  That perpetual look of disgust that resides on the New Englander face this time of year.  "We" are not known for being overly happy.  We realize that this is the way it's going to be for some time ... We hope for spring, but it's like a lot of us don't really think it's going to happen anyway.

     I haven't seen any good flying V's in a while either.  I think even the men are keeping their legs together to stay warm.

Thank you, God

     Thank you, God that ...

- my family is in a warm, safe home.

- that although I will grumble when the bill arrives, I can afford to heat this home.

- that the wind has been at my back so far this morning.

- that I have the common sense to be dressed appropriately for these temperatures. I continue to see people without hats or gloves.  (It's not for lack of funds.  If you can buy a $5 cup of Starbucks whatever, you can afford a knit hat.  Yesterday, several people I work with told me they didn't want to ruin their hair.  I will now question their other decisions.)

- that I work inside.

- that the public transportation I take to work is pretty reliable.  If I were driving, I would be worried about breaking down in these temperatures.  (If you've never experienced being stranded by your car in poor weather ... I'm thankful for that, too.)

Starting Early

     Boy can I pick the best seat mates! I side to myself, "Self, look ... Plenty of room by that guy."  It wasn't till after I sat down that the extremely pungent booze and cigarette odor hit me.  He had a newspaper that was open like 4 inches which he would reflexively open a little more and then close quickly.  And every time I sniffled or shifted, he became adjutated and the paper had to be readjusted.

     .....

     Now I'm sitting by a woman that smells like maple syrup.   Mmmmm ... I may follow her to work.

Spread out

     Perhaps you feel cramped on the train because you haven't brought the proper furniture.

One Handed

     I chose my seat this morning without realizing I wouldn't have the use of my right arm.  It was completely pinned to my side by my seat mate. I was also afraid she might eat me.

     After thankfully transferring to the next train, I continued to be amazed at the "grown-ups" that have to be reminded about train etiquette.  We were jammed up against the door, and at the stop, the guy between me and the door refused to step off so we could let the passengers disembark.  I looked him in the eye, "it's ok, we'll get right back on.  We have to let them off."  Then finally, the chick at my back who tried to push past all of us who were getting off the train.  As though we weren't all going to the same place.

     Oh people ... Sometimes you're exhausting.

Prego

     There's a woman standing in front of me on the crowded train who is periodically patting her non-existent tummy.  As if to imply, "clearly I'm pregnant you should get up and give me your seat."  

     First, I would be happy to do so if she looked at all pregnant.  Now, she may be (skinny jeans aside), but I'm thinking, not so much.  Many times while riding the train pregnant, people offered up their seats to me, and when I was huge or very tired, I gladly accepted.

     Second, use your big girl words if you feel that I don't understand your needs.  "Excuse me, could I please have your seat.  I am great with child and need the rest."  To pat your tummy and not communicate to me is to be petulant.